There should be a support group for fuckers like me.

“Hi I’m Jay.”

“Hi Jay”

“I’m in love with my best friend.”

Grumbles of assent, heads nodding, general support.

“I don’t know when it happened. I’ve always loved her. She’s my best friend, you know.”

“Tell it man.”

“Yeah so, I’m not sure when it changed. From you’re amazing and I love you. To you’re amazing and I love you and I want to fuck you. You know?”

“Mmmhmm.”

“She got a boyfriend,” someone called out.

“She’s gorgeous, she’s always had a boyfriend so no, it’s not that.”

“You sure man? Once someone else has them, notices them … isn’t that when we pay attention?”

“No. I’ve always seen her, always had those what if thoughts but she made it clear she wasn’t thinking of me the same way.”

Mummers of commiserations, someone curses, “Fucking friend zone.”

Exactly. “You get it.”

“We do.”

See, this is what we need. A place to talk about this shit, maybe try to work it out, have some sort of … what was the psycho-babble? Breakthrough?

“It’s tough right now.” I shove a hand through my hair. “Seeing her so happy.”

“You’re happy for her.”

“Yeah. Of course. But …”

“Sucks to be you hey?

“Yeah. Sucks to be me.”

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